Adapted into web novel format on Dec. 22, 2011 at 8:24 PM MST
Portal 2 spoilers and Payback influence ahead.
Soldier shoved a rocket into his launcher. He then called out, "Charge!" and aimed his launcher directly at the ground once more. Just then, he heard a cheerful child-like female voice.
"Welcome!"
Soldier looked at where the voice came from, and saw... that tall, shy bassist standing in the distance?
"I've been waiting for you!" Mio called out. The cheerful voice she spoke in did not fit her usual personality one bit.
Soldier chuckled to himself.
Suddenly, Mio pointed at Soldier. "I wanna challenge you!" she called out in her cheerful voice. That last signal scramble seemed to make her a bit too confident.
"Okay, have it your way," said Rick.
Mio looked down at Rick. "Well?" she asked, then giggled.
"Time to inform your next of kin!" yelled Soldier. He began to run towards Mio with his rocket launcher in hand.
Mio looked up at the approaching Soldier. "Is there something you want to know?" she asked.
"You!" Rick called, addressing Soldier.
"Wah!" Mio yelped, still in her cheerful voice.
"You messed with the wrong woman!" Rick continued.
BLAM!
CRASH! A rocket fired by Soldier flew into the ground near Rick and Mio. The resulting explosion sent Rick flying and caused Mio to jump back.
"Man, that sounded a whole lot better in my head," Rick lamented.
Mio looked to her right and saw that Rick had landed; the explosion didn't send him out very far from her; of course, Rick couldn't move on his own, either.
"Huh?" Mio said in her cheerful voice. "Ah, some people are hopeless."
Meanwhile, Sniper continued to watch the events on the primary mental inhibitor's viewscreen. He realized that, with Rick out of the way, there was now a one-on-one struggle between the shy bassist, Mio, and her aggressor, Soldier. He felt that striking the inhibitor with his kukri could only make things worse. Realizing that there was nothing he could do, Sniper let out a desperate call.
"Incoming!!!"
Then, as if she heard Sniper, Mio looked back to her left and saw Soldier coming towards her.
Soldier called, "We have you surrounded, at least from this side!"
BLAM! He fired a rocket above Mio's head.
Mio gasped loudly.
"All rockets, no brains, eh mate?!" Sniper taunted from the inhibitor room.
Mio gasped again. "Why are you here now?" she asked frantically. She began to speak in a voice similar to her own, but wasn't.
"What's the matter, all-quiet-on-the-Western-front?" Soldier sneered.
BLAM! He fired his last rocket, once again over Mio's head.
"Hey! Cut it out!" Mio yelled in her different voice.
Soldier threw his now-empty rocket launcher aside and pulled his shovel out of his inventory. He then took a few steps toward Mio and said, "Take your lumps like a man, 'cupcake twinkletoes'."
"I told you not to call me that!"
Suddenly, Soldier groaned, "Ohhhh, no." He saw someone else walk past behind Mio. It was Yui, the guitarist girl who was headbobbing earlier. She didn't have "Gitah" on her; even Soldier believed she had put it somewhere safe. Yui was instead focused on Rick, the green-pixel-eyed Adventure Sphere on the ground in front of her. She walked over to him.
Tsumugi also arrived at Rick's position. With her white keytar around her shoulders, she looked at Rick and called out sweetly, "Can you hear me?"
Rick acknowledged with a silent nod of his "head".
Mugi then walked toward Mio and quietly stood behind her. She leaned to her left and curiously looked at Soldier, who stood up straight and placed the L-shaped "loser" gesture with his fingers on his forehead.
"Maggots!" called Soldier.
Unknowingly, Ritsu had also snuck in behind Mugi. Being the constant prankster that she was, Ritsu called out, "Lycopene!"
POW!
"Aah!" yelped Mugi.
"Guh!" gulped Ritsu at the same time.
Mio had thrown an offhand backward punch with her left hand. She unknowingly punched Mugi in the head and caused her to crash into Ritsu. Mugi, facing away from Mio, was hunched over with her hands to her head and stayed perfectly still. Ritsu fell onto her bottom right next to Rick; a noticeable bump had formed on her head.
"Yeah! How'd you like that?!" Rick called out.
Yui was still beside Rick. "Ritsu!" she called sternly as she looked over.
"Mio, why'd you hit me?!" Ritsu groaned accusingly.
Mio angrily turned toward the fallen Ritsu. "What was that for?!" she yelled.
Suddenly, Yui and Ritsu both jumped up. In a panic, they placed one hand on the other's shoulder and clasped their other hands together.
"Violent! She's gotten violent!" said Ritsu.
"Scary!" moaned Yui.
Just then, Ritsu, Yui, and Mio heard a giggle. Mugi stood up straight and faced the group, revealing the smile she hid the whole time. "That was fun!" she said cheerfully. Mugi had finally gotten her wish for Mio to hit her directly on the head. She had hoped for this to happen ever since Ritsu hit her a few months back.
"Wait-- Mugi?" Mio asked in a sudden realization.
"Y-yes?!" Mugi replied excitedly.
Soldier laughed once more. However, he didn't pay attention to the next person to walk onto the field.
"Mio? Hello?" Azusa called. She walked over to her bandmates and Rick while wearing her cat-eared headband and holding a dark brown cane. Yui, Ritsu, and Mugi all pointed to Azusa's left.
Kshzzzt!
BRAWwwwwwwooonhh! The inhibitor signals suddenly scrambled with a futuristic reverberating ricochet noise.
Azusa looked over and saw Mio looking back at her.
"Cheer up!" Azusa assured as she pumped her fist into the air.
Mio felt slightly confused that Azusa would have her cat ears and a cane at a time like this. "Are you planning to use that against him?" she asked. However, the voice that came out of Mio's mouth was even more child-like than the cheerful child-like voice, to the point where it sounded similar to Azusa's voice.
"You are a coward!" claimed Soldier. "I am going to strangle you with your own frilly dress!"
Mio fell into a state of shock. Her "frilly dress" was first mentioned when Soldier invaded, and it was a factor of the embarrassing circumstances that she would rather forget!
"W-- what do I do?!" Mio moaned desperately as she hunched over. Her voice had gone back to normal.
"Don't give up!" Yui called.
Mio looked over at her friends who were out in the field. Azusa waved excitedly with her right hand while she held her cane in her left hand. Ritsu gleefully held Rick above her head with both hands. Yui threw an outward peace-sign gesture with her right hand, and Mugi had her hands on her hips. It was anyone's guess as to why those fellow bandmates would make those poses, especially the random ones done by Yui and Mugi.
Rick knew it was time for him to express his adventuring encouragement to Mio once more. He called out, "This ain't Marquis of Queensberry Rules, sweetie! Pour on the mustard!"
"Let's go!" said Azusa. She swiped her cat ears off her head with both hands and held them out towards Yui.
"Come on!" said Yui as she snatched the cat ears from Azusa with her left hand. She then looked over to Mio and continued to reassure her. "It'll be all right, Mio!"
Suddenly, Mugi ran in front of the group. She pulled her keytar off her shoulders and swung it to her side. Then, as if by instinct, Mugi leaned into a one-crossed-leg crouch, pushed her keytar outward while gripping it tightly in her outstretched left hand, and pulled its strap tight with her right hand. Mugi was now holding her keytar as if she was wielding a bow. How a keyboardist like her even knew of such a pose was anybody's guess, but it may have been related to the video game character she sounded like earlier.
Mugi then called out, "You've been training for this!"
Soldier couldn't help but laugh at seeing Mugi's spontaneously random pose.
With the cat ears in hand, Yui ran beside Mugi, who was still in her battle stance. Yui tossed the cat ears over to Mio. Mio managed to catch them above her head with both hands, but then the mental inhibitor signals scrambled once more.
Kshzzzt!
Mio slipped the cat ears back onto her head. She cleared her throat and mimicked a cat's meow in Japanese as she performed a catlike gesture in front of her face with both hands. However, the voice she spoke in didn't seem like hers.
"Nyaa~," she said. Mio was in the very gesture that Azusa made when she first joined their band.
Soldier was delighted that Mio was not fighting back at all, instead resorting to cutesy tactics in order to try to soften him up. "Aww, am I too violent for you, cupcake?" Soldier sneered.
"Ah!" Mio moaned in a shocked gasp.
Azusa cupped her hands around her mouth. "S--s--s-- Stop! Stop, please!" she begged Soldier.
"Negatory!" replied Soldier. He felt he wasn't done yet.
Mio nodded to herself with a quiet gulp, then looked to her right at her fellow bandmates. She pulled off the cat ears with her left hand. "Hey, guys!" she called in her own voice as she waved her closed left hand above her head.
In the middle of the field, Mugi, no longer in her spontaneous bow-wielding pose, was standing with her keytar around her shoulders. Ritsu stood beside Mugi and continued to hold Rick in her hands. Yui and Azusa stood next to the others and beside each other. The cane was behind Azusa.
Mio flung the cat-eared-headband back toward Azusa, who leaned forward. The headband landed perfectly into place on Azusa's head.
"Yes!" Yui cheered. Azusa looked over in slight confusion.
Suddenly, Rick provided more encouragement toward Mio. "Come on, sweetie!" Rick called out. "He's got a glass jaw! He's got glass everything! This guy's a china cabinet!"
Ritsu could not help but giggle upon hearing Rick's motivating remarks. Mugi placed her hands on her cheeks and smiled in astonishment.
"Pain is weakness leaving the body!" Soldier countered, using one of his most well-known lines.
At the inhibitors, Sniper was still watching the struggle on the inhibitor viewscreen. He replied to Soldier's taunt with his own counter-taunt. "What goes around comes around, you snotty little nance," Sniper muttered.
Yui and Azusa nodded at each other in unison. Azusa grabbed the cane from behind her, and placed the bottom half of its shaft onto Yui's hands while she held onto the cane's rounded handle and the top half of the shaft. With a quick count, both girls threw their arms in a synced underhand motion and tossed the cane over to Mio.
Mio caught the cane by the handle with her right hand even though she was left-handed. Then she heard Rick's voice once more.
"Here. Let me put on some adventure music!" Rick offered. He blared an uptempo rock song from his unseen vocoder speakers.
Mio smiled briefly at Rick; she recognized the song as soon as she recognized the guitar riffs and its accompanying keyboard sequence. This song was created by the very bandmates who were, at that moment, witnesses to or participants in the struggle against Soldier, and Mio herself had sung lead vocals on it!
The actions that this now-motivated bassist would perform next, and how someone like her would know of such spontaneously random action poses, could only be anyone's guess. With both hands, Mio swung the cane's handle toward Soldier. She then spun the cane around just in front of her, and then held it at an angle at her head with the tip facing down.
"Keep it up, baby!" called Rick.
"Ha! You fight like a girl!" Soldier sneered.
Just then, Sniper saw the video on the inhibitor viewscreen become pixelated. The next image that formed onscreen was of an elderly, strict former army general who wore a green uniform with many medals across his chest, and had ruffled silver-gray hair and a matching beard. Sniper recognized this former general as the visual alias of Soldier himself. Soldier had used this onscreen alias when he chased down that shy little bassist nearly six months ago to re-traumatize her.
However, the events that just transpired showed that the shy little bassist was not the girl she used to be.
Soldier's voice was heard while the former general's mouth moved along to his words. "The last word out of your sorry mouth will be 'Sir'!"
The inhibitor viewscreen re-pixelated to the scene in the city; Soldier was now shown without his visual alias.
"And it will be loud!" finished Soldier.
Mio shoved the cane against Soldier's chest. Her reply was in a cold mature voice that wasn't exactly hers.
"No, you damn insect!"
POW!
Mio had kicked Soldier in the groin just as the rock song ended. The impact was so hard it knocked him off his feet. Soldier let go of his shovel and let out a long scream as he fell to the ground unconscious.
Sniper laughed proudly upon hearing the very creative insult Mio gave Soldier.
At the same time, Scout had arrived at the field. He also laughed, but at the downed Soldier himself. "Ha ha ha! You got owned!" he said. "You're a disgrace to your uniform, pal!"
Mugi couldn't stifle her sudden laugh.
"Hey hey!" Yui called to her nearby bandmates. "What should we do after this?"
Azusa replied, "For now, let's have some cake!"
"Okay!" said Ritsu.
With the cane in her left hand, Mio looked once more at the unconscious Soldier. She giggled, then wiped a happy tear from her eye with her right hand and looked over at her bandmates. She then heard Rick's satisfied voice.
"Ha ha! Oh yeah!" said Rick.
Mio giggled again and winked.
KshzzzBOOM!
An explosion rocked the primary inhibitor and caused Sniper to jump back. "Holy dooley!" Sniper muttered.
